The thing that gets me about polyamory is the way it’s billed as an evolved type of relationship structure. As if polyamorous people are moving beyond the antiquated strictures of monogamy forced upon us by the need for financial stability, ensuring the survival of our offspring, or the materialistic desire to possess or control one another, to embrace the complex truth of human sexuality.
After a couple of unsatisfying Tinder dates with guys who looked promising on screen but in reality were kind of “meh”, I decided to take the old fashioned route and go out with a guy I had already met in three dimensional space. To say that I knew him was a stretch- I talked to
As I reconsider old stereotypes about masculinity, femininity, and power dynamics in relationships, I am starting to wonder if the ideas I have about whose job it is to woo and be wooed are as old fashioned as Rhett Butler. I met him on Tinder, and we had an ok first date. He was friendly
I’ve been thinking about masculine strength and why I find it so damn sexy. Essentially, I think what attracts me most is confidence. But what passes for male confidence is often a sham of conceit overlaying a fear of vulnerability, rather than the relaxed way of a man who is not in turmoil over the disparity between what he presents to the world versus what he is experiencing inside. I wonder how many of us know what true masculine strength even looks like. If it looked like sensitivity, could we respect it?
As a newly single woman in her forties with young children who is rebuilding her career after staying home for six years, why do I want to talk about sex, when talking about anything complicated these days is asking for trouble?